Evia: Still Can't See the Forest (Whitaker) for the Trees

Evia's latest indocrination is more of the same old self-entitled whining that has been addressed before, but I will address it again. In her latest post, she once again attacks a Black man (and all Black men by extension) who dare not find her "type" sexy. I'll just point out some of the things that bothered me.

1) Why is a Black woman who is supposedly happily married to a White man and who advocates Black women date out interested in who Black men find attractive?

2) Evia once again foolishly compares job performance (something with objective criteria) to sexual attraction (something subjective).

3) Evia creates a strawman by giving Black men their argument that we would be upset at the Australian producer who did not want to cast Forest Whitaker. Actually I agree with the Australian producer if his job is on the line. He has every right to put whoever he thinks can make his film the most successful.

4) Evia once again ignores reality. Forest Whitaker has a successful acting career with an Oscar to show for it. He also seems to be a happily married man with happy children. Even when a Black man succeeds he can't win with the Something Screwed Crew. However, when one is as self-serving and selfish as Evia, facts will not register. Even IF Forest Whitaker was a flaming colorist, he married an attractive woman, what is what most men ulitmately want. Why should Forest pass on such a woman and keep looking for someone that meets Evia's approval? Who the fuck is Evia?

5) Gwen Ifill is single for the very simple reason that men are not looking for Gwen Ifill. Gwen Ifill has been surrounded by powerful men of all races in her career, yet none of them have managed to hook up with her. At 54, it hasn't been just Black men that don't find her marriage worthy, it has been All men.

6) Doesn't Evia realize that she sounds like a nasty, sexual predator. Demanding Quid Pro Quo or threatening to "starve" Black men for marrying who they please? What? Just because she paid $7 for a movie ticket she thinks this gives her the right to tell Forest Whitaker where to stick his dick for the rest of his life? What ever happened to going to a movie and enjoying it because you like the content?

How big of a pig of a woman do you have to be to threaten men to find you attractive? Did White women threaten to boycott the Beatles after John Lennon married Yoko Ono or threaten to boycott FOX after Rupert Murdoch married his Chinese bride?

7) If Forest Whitaker drove a cab or worked in a cafeteria, do you think Evia would be lamenting the skin tone of his wife? I wonder how many of these so called darked skin sisters turned away Forest and his "funny eye" before he became a world famous actor. Why is it okay for Black women to be able the select and reject who they wish, but Black men have to adhere to some standard or otherwise be labeled "damaged".

8) As yanmommasaid pointed out:

If a Black man dates a light skin woman, it must be because he is a trifling, no good, self-hating, momma hating, wanna be white man, lowdown no good ass-kissing uncle tom. And the light skin woman is a bitch who is taking advantage of her "priviledge" and thus faces much scorn from other Black women.

However if a White man dates the very same light skin woman, it is a match made in heaven and she is soul sister #1, an inspiration to all Black women who wish to date non-Black (mostly White) men.

And a vast majority of the women on earth standing next to Eddie Murphy are going to be lighter than him. Should he limit himself to a much smaller percentage of the female population just so he can get Evia's $7?

9) In the ultimate irony, the last part of the article talks about dangerous Black men who won't take no for an answer from Black women who don't want them. Yet, earlier she is the one threatening to "starve" someone for not taking an interest in someone like her. If Evia and women like her had the physical strength, I would fear for men like Forest Whitaker.

Lying Well: How Evia Abuses the Truth

Evia is up to her old desperate tricks again. I guess I will take on the assignment of exposing her. This time she relies on the old standby that marriages between Black women/Non-Black Men are some panacea while passive-agressively taking a shot at couples featuring Black Men and White women.

In the video posted on her site, it qouted the following from the Education Resources Information Center:

The literature on interracial families has examined social stigmas attached to interracial relationships but has not thoroughly documented whether crossing racial boundaries increases the risk of divorce. Using the 2002 National Survey of Family Growth (Cycle VI), we compare the likelihood of divorce for interracial couples to that of same-race couples. Comparisons across marriage cohorts reveal that, overall, interracial couples have higher rates of divorce, particularly for those marrying during the late-1980s. We also find race and gender variation. Compared to White/White couples, White female/Black male, and White female/Asian male marriages were more prone to divorce; meanwhile, those involving non-White females and White males and Hispanics and non-Hispanic persons had similar or lower risks of divorce.

First problem is that it is only an abstract. The Something Screwed Crew (SSC) loves qouting that abstract. Has any of them ever read the whole Journal article? Has any of them ever provided any official statistics regarding how individual groups fair when marrying interracial? Is there an official break down showing how Black women/White Men vs. Asian Women/White men couples do? If anyone has these stats please provide them.

Second issue is notice the part I italicized states non-White females. Somehow Evia and the producer of that video ignores that part and morphs non-White females into Black females and the video showed nothing about any other non-White female group, which is what the stat inferred. If the majority of White men in interracial relationships are involved with non-Black females, (mostly Asian women), then isn't most of the credit due to non-Black women?

The third issue is the funniest to me. While parading the various Black women/Non-Black men featured in the video (I thought that the abstract was about White men/Non-White women?) this supposedly educated woman and her video rattles off a ordinal ranking listing of the "most successful interracial marriages". Where did they get this info from? Cosmo magazine! Excuse me, I am going to damage my ribs laughing.

Time to shed some light on the truth.

Reality Check 1 - If Black women are such great marriage partners with such successful marriages, then why are 70% of them single? Why aren't Non-black men beating a path to their doors and pursuing them like they do all other groups of women?

Reality Check 2 - If Black Men/White women couples are so poor in relation to Black Women/White men, then why in 2007 were there as many Black Women/White Men couples (126,000) as there were Black Men/White Women couples (122,000) in 1980? In other words, in terms of the number of couples, Black Women/White Men couples are 27 years behind.

http://www.census.gov/compendia/statab/tables/09s0059.pdf

Reality Check 3 - Why is this even a competition? Why does someone else need to fail in order for Evia and the SSC to feel successful? I can throw out stats too. Did you know that children fathered in Black Men/White Women relationships have an IQ that is 8-9 points higher than children fathered in Black women/White Men relationships? Google Willerman, Naylor and Myrianthopoulos for more info. When the Black Man/White Woman were married, the IQ is 104.7, higher than the average White (which is around 100). If Black Women/White Men couples were so magically successful, why don't they produce offspring that are more likely to succeed?

Ultimate Reality Check - Ultimately who cares? People don't marry groups, they marry individuals. Or at least that is what they should strive to. If you are in a relationship with someone and that person makes you happy, why do you care what your groups stats say.

I Almost Don't Care Anymore

I have not posted in a while for a reason. I just don't care as much anymore. Don't get me wrong I have plenty of material and I always come to my computer with ideas. When I sit down, I just find other things to do that I enjoy more.

I am not going away. I will post when the moment strikes and I will still follow the other blogs I have been following. Shout outs to Una, Rocky, Queens, and Raina and others.

I am tired of the same old same old. I try to stick to the issues (admittely don't always succeed)and all I get greeted with is nastiness, the same old guilting and shaming tactics, and accusations of wanting White women and hating Black women. As if I have something to gain for Black women suffering. Of course "suffering" to them means not being wanted by certain men (i.e. wealthy men), not actual suffering like getting stoned to death for being raped or getting their clitorises cut off.

I don't hate the Something Screwed Crew (SSC), in fact I truly pity them and I cringe for those sane and mentally balanced Black women (shout outs to mskitty and MrsRony) like I cringe for myself when people use negative images of Black men to represent me. After all what group of women on this planet chase after men? Is there any other group of women on this planet so overly reliant on guilt and shame and emotional blackmail as these women are? Why don't they realize that other races of women get married because they offer men QUALITY and not hide behind history or play the race or colorism card as the SSC is quick to do when they don't get their way. And when I say quality, I mean quality that men are looking for, not self-imposed ideas that they think they can shove down men's throats in the face of centuries of human conditioning.

The SSC loves their freedom. They love the fact that they can go to universities, they can open businesses, they can buy homes, they can date and marry whoever they want, etc. However, the SSC can't stand that Black men have the same freedom. For some reason they are under the impression that the Civil Rights Movement was designed to transfer control of Black men lives from White male hands to Black Women hands.

In addition to intolerance for Black men's freedom, the SSC cannot tolerate personal responsibility. They go around declaring how independant they are and when people leave them to their independance they get nasty. They want the freedom to sleep with who they want, but when they get burned by that bad decision and end up with and STD or unwanted kids it is not their fault. It is all Black men's fault.

They blame Black men like me for not lecturing other Black men who do not take care of their kids. What the fuck I am supposed to say to discourage a man who you keep offering up easy pussy to? These women keep rewarding these bad men and then only after the bad men reveal that general truth that bad men don't usually make very good fathers then and only then they lash out. It never occurs to them to keep their legs closed to bad men or at the very least, use some form of birth control. Like animals they can't even put on a fucking condom, yet I am supposed to do something about these women and their plight?

I myself purposely do not have any kids. I will not have any until I get married. And before you mean and nasty people who read this try to insult me, I have had my chances. Not to get overly graphic, but once I was without a condom and a woman insisted that I put it in anyway. While there may be no better feeling than an uncovered penis inside a vagina, I was so petrified at the thought of having a kid like that I easily declined. That is the extent of my control. I have no interest in taking care of anyone else's bastard(s). I did not spend all these years exercising caution and self control to suffer the consequences of someone else's mistake. I have no interest in lecturing other grown ass men on how to live, especially when these grown ass men are going to be rewarded with poontang by equally irresponsible, retarded ass women.

If they want to blame Black men for everything then so be it. If they want to believe that they are the ultimate victims in the history of the universe, then so be it. If they want to believe that White men are fueling up buses getting ready to send those buses to Black neighborhoods to gather up all the Black women they can love, then let them belive that. If they want to continue to ignore the extreme message that the 70% single rate should be screaming at them, then that is their choice. If they want to believe that my unwillingess to kiss their ass and completely subjugate my will to their desires means that I must hate all Black women and therefore "crave" White women then let them. A side note, notice that is always stated as a "craving" for White women. Why can't I ever "crave" Asian women or Latina women or other women? Perhaps they are revealing more about where they are insecure than they intend to. Whatever folly they choose to believe will be to their own detriment, and not mines.

As for me, I have built my life to the point where I have options, professionally and personally. My life is not perfect, but I am going strong in these tough economic times. I feel I could do better, and to do so I am going to focus my main efforts on what I need to the most: How to improve myself. Something the SSC should do also, but I doubt that they will.

Say no to Illogic - Myth of Evia's E-zine

I am shaking my head as I read Evia's latest self-serving rant. In this essay I will point out a few things that caught my eye. I will put Evia's writing in red then follow with a response.

I've faced the fact that even if I post a million pics here and even if I posted our marriage certificates here with our pics engraved on the certificates, it wouldn't matter because many people just do NOT want to believe that we're happy-content-satisfied in our relationships, which have the usual relationships' ups and downs.

If Evia posted a million pics of American Black Women involved in interracial marriages, she would have to fabricate about 850,000 of those pics. I have posted the stats on BW and interracial marriage, people can take them or leave them.

And trust me: neither race, nor ethnicity has anything to do with male size, sexual potency or performance. This has been proven by research. However, AA males keep telling bw this HYPE. The next time one of these males says this to you, ask him how exactly is it that bm KNOW that wm can't "jump" unless they've been sexing wm? I've heard and read where some of them claim that ww have told them that. LOL! Smart move. It would be totally dumb for a ww to be in bed with a bm and tell him that wm are better. Enough said about that particular hype. The need for critical thinking is CRITICAL, y'all.

First problem, the biggest purveyor of the idea of Black Male Potency are not Black men nor Black Women, it is the very White men that Evia are trying to pimp to Black women. It is White men who control the media, and who control the porn industry that insists on that standard. I personally don't place that much importance on group anything let alone group Phallic Size. Evia forgets that many of these White men play sports with and share locker rooms with Black men. If White Men who control the media keep playing it up, maybe it is their own feelings that should be questioned.

Secondly, how insulting is this to Black women, assuming that they are only interested in Black men only because of some sexual myth. As if Black Women who don't agree with her are incapable of having higher interests such as shared history or struggle or just plain preference for Black men. Once again if you dare disagree with the almighty Evia, something must be wrong with you.

But hear this: hundreds of thousands (million?) of the the STRONGEST, MOST MASCULINE MALES could not possibly be caged in prison by weaker males. If I'm wrong, then what does "strong" and "most masculine" mean? Or, if it is true that black males are the strongest and most masculine men on earth, then what good is being strong and masculine when other men have to feed you and can put you in cages whenever they want? What is being strong and masculine really worth if the bulk of these males have abandoned most of their defenseless children? All of the superiority nonsense is a joke told to foolish women who reward these jokers by paying attention to them and giving them what they what they want. Sensible bw do not pay attention to any bm who peddles that kind of hype.

Perhaps Evia has never heard of the Holocaust. You know that thing where 6 million Jews were ripped from there homes and killed. Do people consider Jewish people weak, and especially the Men less masculine because of what happened to them? After all they were caged and fed until their deaths by the Germans.

Of course not, most sane and intelligent people consider them as victims. Their group intelligence (Jewish people are and have always been among the most educated groups wherever they live) did not prevent their victimization. Their wealth (which was confiscated by the Germans) did not prevent their victimization.

How does this relate? The Something Screwed Crews hatred for themselves and their Blackness have lead them down the path of worshipping the victimization of their ancestors and their descendants (us) as a sign of Black men's weakness. Not just Evia, but many of them. They defecate on the graves of every person who suffered and lived and died so they could be free to act the fools that they act today, both Black Men and Women. While I disagree with Mr. Queens when he calls these women "Sellouts" just for marrying White Men, I call these women sellouts for disgracing the suffering of their own people. I don't care who marries who, but when you have to justify it like this, then shame on you.

Secondly reading that passage from Evia, I would believe that Evia thinks all cops are White Men and all criminals are Black Men. No Black men (or women or Asian) law enforcement officers and no White (or Asian or Women) criminals. Need I explain the folly of this any further?


Finally on this point, not everybody is a front runner like Evia. Few fair and honest people would deny that being a White Man in America is not the most challenging of circumstances. There are people who do admire and see strength in Black Men because they continue to persevere even though not every thing is set up in their favor. Where many other groups have fled their countries in search of a greener pasture, or have been completely terminated, Blacks and Black Men have fought to get what they have. Not everybody is inclined to kiss ass just so they can "live in the suburbs".

Let's be realistic about this. No group is superior. Individuals must be vetted and judged INDIVIDUALLY.

Then why does your blog continually contradict this message? Don't see a whole lot about vetting any other group except White men.

Many wm and other non-bm who are interested in bw as potential mates also need to see these pics to know that many AA women they see everyday who may appear not to be interested in wm or non-bm are very interested, but just don't quite know how to subtly give them the "green light" and connect with them. And of course, many wm, like various other men, fear rejection, but this means that BOTH of them are going to have to take the risk or if not, in many cases, they will miss out on having the wonderful type of relationship that you describe below.

Try as best as you can to follow Evia's logic: Black men are weak because they are caged and fed by stronger White men, yet somehow these same Strong White men need to see pictures on HER website because they FEAR being rejected by the women that are associated with the weak Black men that they cage and feed.

Are you fucking jiving me?

Women who don't know how to give men a signal that they are interested? Is there such a thing? Why does a strong man need any signal? Strong and assertive men know what they want and don't wait for signals, they take action. White men are not waiting for Asian Women to signal them.

It's really a LOT of these Christian leaders (both black and white, females and males) who keep wm and bw apart.

Oh my god (pun intended) is this woman out of her mind with paranoia. Once again, shouldn't these strong masculine White men overcome any barriers to get to their Black Queens?

There is really a lot of vile behavior that has always been committed by Christians though (the Crusades, racism, sexism, etc). I've wondered too how such ***devout*** Christians could hate other people that God made, that is IF they really believe in God and IF they believe that God made these other people.

Maybe this is something she should ask herself as she has shown no grace nor mercy to what she called DBR Black Men. Aren't they god's children also?

If you're going to continue to remain in the "Christian" setting, I'd suggest that you join a multiracial church that has a sizeable number of wm/non-bm members in your age category and you have to make it a point to be approachable or maybe you're the outgoing type who can comfortably approach guys?.

Foolish me, I thought Church was a place to worship the Lord. Don't get me wrong, I know many people meet their spouses at church. However, going to Church with another agenda doesn't sound very Christian-like to me.

I've always mixed with a wide variety of other groups of people, so I feel comfortable in many settings, but most people don't get the chance or don't create opportunities to mix with a wide variety of others from other groups, so they only have the stereotypic lens to view each other through and let's face it, the negative stereotypes about both blacks and whites are BAD.

The only thing that she wrote that I almost agree with. I say almost agree because she omits Asians and Latinos and other people. She never really focuses on them anyway, so I am not surprised.

Double Standard On Blogspot?

There were two sites on Blogspot one named White Women Suck and the other Black Women Suck. As of last week, the Black Women site was blocked by blogspot, yet the White Women site remains open. Why? Of course I find the idea and content of both of these sites highly objectionable, so please don't write me pretending that I am for one site over the other. I am not. What I want to know is why the double standard? If one site is objectionable enough to close then why not the other? Or maybe enough people have not flagged the White Women Suck blog. If not I encourage you to do so by clicking here.

For those of you wondering why do I care, I am reminded of what is on the Holocaust Museum in DC:

Thou shalt not be a victim. Thou shalt not be a perpetrator. Above all, thou shalt not be a bystander.

If you are reading this and agree please click here and not be a bystander.

Difference Between Preference and Discrimination

In Evia's latest post she continues to foolishly compare actual racial discrimination with someone's individual dating preferences. I will do my best to shed some light on this. First I will qoute you what she said

I continue to get notes from black men arguing that they have the "right" to prefer lighter-whiter skin shades in women, but they do not want to accept that they are upholding the white racist construct that says that light/white skin people are superior, more attractive, more intelligent and more desirable to be around than darker skinned people. Why then do these same men get so furious when whites discriminate against them in hiring, police brutality, driving while black,--on the basis of their darker skin shades. It's all about skin shade. It's the SAME reason for that white person's discrimination.

I'll address the first part first. You notice that she never applies this logic to any other pairing other than Black Men/White Women. There are more White Man/Asian Women Couples than there are Black Men /White Woman couples and Asian Men/White Women couples combined. Are White Men guilty of creating a construct of Yellow supremacy? And unless if these same Black Men sexually crave White Men, then how does the Black Man/White Woman pairing uphold White Supremacy? It doesn't. Finally why doesn't Evia take the glass is half-full approach and view it the other way: White Women who date Black Men are rejecting the notion of White Supremacy. Of course this would be giving White Women credit for something good and her platform cannot possibly allow that.

The only real problem that Evia has with this pairing is that it doesn't favor Evia.

I know Black men who prefer Non-Black Women, Black men who prefer light-skinned Black women, Black Men who prefer Dark Skinned Women, and Black men who prefer men. Why is one set of these men entitled to their preferences and the others are not? What the Evias of the world don't get is that the biggest turnoff is not their looks, but it is the self-centered entitlement that states "like me or there must be something severely mentally wrong with you".

As for the second part, she compares police brutality to someone not wanting to date you on Saturday night. Is this woman serious? For those of you have not figured this out let me tell you the critical difference: When the police beats Leroy, there is a victim involved. When Leroy does not want to go out with Tamika, Tamika is not a victim, regardless of the reason that Leroy does not want to go out with her. Got it. Leroy has constitutional rights (to due process, to avoid cruel and unusual punishment, etc) When the police beat him up, they deprive him of those rights. Tamika has no moral, constitutional or legal rights to Leroy's affection. Fittingly we have laws on the books against the police beating Leroy up and none for Leroy not asking for Tamika's phone number.

As for hiring it is a little trickier because an employer that does not want to hire blacks could find a number of reasons not to and it is harder to prove discrimination. What happens when a employer does discriminate? The company loses because that employer is limiting the company's employee pool from the best of everybody to only one group (whites). The competent white workers lose because they have to work harder to compensate for the incompetent whites that were hired in place of competent blacks. The people who invest in the company loses because the incompetent whites are holding the company back and society loses because incompetent people are working while competent people are not. Hence we have laws against it.

On the other hand if Leroy is dating Molly while Tamika sits at home, nothing is lost except to the parties involved. If Tamika is "all that" then she will find somebody else and Leroy will miss out. If not, then she deserves to be at home alone. Leroy and Molly have each other and if that makes them happy, we live in a free society that allows us to pursue that happiness. Why does anyone have a problem with that?

The difference between true racial discrimination and personal preference in a free society is that the former attempts to and has the ability to forcibly interfere with the latter. The police or the people hiring have power over Leroy. Tamika has free will where it pertains to Leroy (the choice to obsess over him or not is hers).

And why does Evia care anyway? Isn't she supposed to be a BW-IR blogger. She contradicts herself in her own post. She writes:

Let me make myself clear AGAIN-LOL! I'm not interested in who AA males date or marry because...

then a few paragraphs later she is writing:

BE HONEST: HOW MANY AA MEN DO YOU KNOW WHO'D LOVE TO DATE A WOMAN WITH THIS WOMAN'S COMPLEXION? Hmmmm. I can hear the silence. LOL!

I thought she didn't care. In fact I could have qouted the entire second portion which was a study done on colorism of college students at some midwestern college. Why would she or her followers truly care what Black men do and who they prefer?

Click here for a very insightful explanation.

Violence Against Women: Harmful to All

As predicted, you knew that the Something Screwed Crew (SSC) would use the Chris Brown/Rhianna situation to further their agenda. As if this "proves" white men are better at taking care of women. If you want to believe that then fine. I posted the above video to give you an alternative view. And in many ways the video above is worse. Why? Chris Brown is only a 19-20 year old immature young adult. The "Officer" is a 31 year old professional who should know better. I am not advocating that a 31 year old man should ever beat up a 15 year old girl, but if one does, one should make sure that a camera is not on. And this guy was supposed to be watching the public? Yikes.

We do not have all of the details but one thing I will agree with is that Chris Brown should have been better than to even let it come to the point where we are talking about this. I have had a woman or two trigger my fight/flight response and I always take flight.

The SSC always lament at how white women supposedly receive a superior level of protection from their men. The stats that I got from the National Domestic Violence Hotline website paints a different picture:

• 43% of women and 26% of men in multiracial non-Hispanic households suffered partner violence.

• 39% of women and 18.6% of men in American Indian/Alaska Native households suffered partner violence.

• 26.8% of women and 15.5% of men in white non-Hispanic households suffered partner violence

• 29.2% of women and 23.3% of men in black non-Hispanic households suffered partner violence.

• 20.5% of women and 15.5% of men in Hispanic households suffered partner violence.

So the most abused women are those in multiracial and American Indian relationships. Notice that the most abused men are men in Multiracial relationships and Black Men in relationships with Black Women.

RealityCheck: According to the NDVH 1 out 4 Women and 1 out of 9 men will suffer from domestic violence in their lifetimes. Dating and mating another race will not make you immune.