I am starting to feel sorry for Evia and her followers. For all of their supposed education, they lack a basic understanding of how things actually work in reality. I will do my best to clue them in with this post.
In her latest treatise on bed wenching, Evia cautions women from marrying "beneath their level". Quite honestly, I don't begrudge them of that. Historically women do find the best providers as the most suitable mates. In today's world that often means having more money, more education, more societal power, etc. What Evia and her followers refuse to acknowledge is that men and especially powerful men with options in his choice of female historically look for the most loyal and compatible best looking female or the "prize" if you will. And that is men of ALL RACES, not just "brainwashed black men". Men generally don't care what women do for a living nor where they went to college as long as it doesn't affect them in the relationship.
What this means is that if you want to be picky about your mate that is your choice, but be aware that your potential mate is doing the same. Whereas Evia and her followers have narrowed their fields down to only the highest potential males, high potential males have a much wider field to choose from, as long as the woman is physically beautiful and compatible with his life. And here comes the painful truth for the Evia's of the world: most times these high potential men do not see plain and unattractive females, and especially plain and unattractive black females in that light.
Before people jump on me, I am not saying that there are no attractive black females. There are and I have met many of them. What I am saying is that if the Evia's of the world want to date the best men, then they are gonna to have to compete with ALL WOMEN, blondes, brunettes, red heads, Asians, Latinas, Arabs, Native American, Blacks, etc,. Each group has it's beauties, it's plains, and it's uglies. High powered men pick from the beauties of each group.
Try as hard as they may to redefine the paradigm, no amount of horseshit can cover the reality: men want attractive women above all. In American society, the definition of attractive usually does not include the Evias. You can see it for yourself in any beer commercial, or any boxing match (check out the ring girls) or any music video, you know what I am saying.
So assuming that this "Darren" (chuckle) exists , how many Darrens are there? How many rich powerful successful white men that cook, clean, makes great love and gives you good sex, take care of your kids whether they are his biologically or not, and treat you like a queen are out there looking for a plain to unattractive black woman to marry? Well in general White American men of all classes are not looking to marry any black women, as less than 1 out 400 have a black wife! This is why majority of these black women who follow Evia will "settle" for a less than white man, if they can get one at all. If you live outside of the US (like the UK) please spare me the international lesson on interracial relations. This article is about black American women and American men, since most of these women will not leave the country in order to find a spouse.
How desperate is Evia for a white man's attention? At the beginning of the her article she boasts about an ad that features a white male and black female. One simple point: THEY WERE SELLING SCHOOL SUPPLIES, THEY WERE NOT DATING NOR MATING AND THE AD DID NOT IMPLY THAT AS THEY WERE NOT EVEN TOUCHING! Please get a grip on reality woman. If anyone wants to argue the numbers, then be my guest, but they are what they are. As of 2006, even though there were 3 times as many black american women as there were Asian American women, there were 4.5 times as many Asian Women/White Man couples as there were Black Woman/White man couples. Or in words, white men choose 13.5 Asian women for marriage for every black women he selects. If you are an Evia follower, are you ready for the competiton with this sect? Are you ready to compete with White Women and Latinas? Are you ready to compete with other black women (like cheerleaders and models), with half the education and twice the physical beauty as yourself? Are you ready to compete with other black women with twice the education and twice the beauty as yourself?
Of course in the Evia's perfect world, they would all be married to black men who are rich. Three barriers prevent this. The first barrier is that the number of black men with a six figure salary is not that big. Of course the number of people in society at large that make the much is not very big either. The second barrier is that black men who do earn that much tend to stay single and enjoy the "perks" of being a sought after male. I recently read (not sure how accurate it is) somewhere that 76% of black men that earn over $100K are single. And the third barrier which generates the most fire, is that out of the black men earning over $100K that are married, 60% of them are married to non-black women. The remaining 40% are probably married to women that look more like Vanessa Williams (the former Miss America, and not the other actress with the same name).
This should be okay according to Evia, right? I mean if black women have the right to vet (hate that word) black men as women have always historically done, shouldn't black men have the same right to vet women? In Evia's view, of course not. In typical hypocritical fashion she writes this to the woman who sought her advice on her potential mate:
DROP HIM! He's NOT on your level. He won't be comfortable in your professional circle or your expanding social circle.
Now imagine if Evia and her followers heard two black men talking and one said this to the other:
Drop HER! She's not on your level. She won't be comfortable in your professional circle or your expanding social circle (with her nappy head and dark skin).
Evia and her followers would probably lapse into an anaphylactic seizure if they heard this. While Evia encourages black women to date white men, she demonizes black men who exercise their choice of mates as "racists". They are not preferences as she do not think black men are worthy enough to be able to have preferences. To her these black men are just as bad as any white racist for not considering plain and unattractive black women as mates. Hypocrisy at it's finest. I'll do more on that in another post sometime later.
I will sum up all this with two reality checks:
Reality Check 1: Nearly every little girl grows up dreaming of marrying the prince, or a doctor, or a lawyer, or the star athlete. Just remember that you are in competition with every other girl who is now a woman who is looking for the same thing. If you want to win, you better be able to bring it physically, and that's at a bare minimum. It doesn't matter how many or what type of degrees you have since little boys who grow into big men grow up daydreaming about cheerleaders, swimsuit models, Victoria Secrets, Playboy, etc. Go ahead and try and outthink the Paradigm and call such men "immature". It won't work. I'm not saying other things such as loyalty, intelligence, integrity, chemistry, personality, class, compatibility, etc are not important. They are, but without the preceding physical attraction, a man probably will not hang around a woman long enough to discover those other attributes.
Reality Check 2: My neverending disclaimer: There is nothing wrong with two people of any race (or any sex for that matter), if they wanna hook up or get married, it is not my business. It happens all the time. If Bjorn and Monique meet in the bookstore in the travel section and start talking and fall in love, more power to them. Just realize that they are the exception and not the rule. If you go sniffing around another race expecting them to love you more than your own loves you, don't be dissapointed when that doesn't happen. Don't be suprised if you end up like the image at the top of this post.
11 comments:
One of the key points you make is the point on competition. Evia and the others seem to have this illusion that there are all of these available white men out there to pick from. They seem to try and justify their emphasis on white men as opposed to non-white, non-black men by citing white men's larger numbers, yet this entire point is negated by the even larger numbers of non-black women that are competing for these white men. White men have shown clearly that white women are generally their first choices while Asian women are their second choices. Why would a group of black women make a pseudo movement whereas they seek a group of men who have placed them in third place?
most times these high potential men do not see plain and unattractive females, and especially plain and unattractive black females in that light
This is definitely true with regard to high potential white men. They are not seeking plain and unattractive women of their own race and are definitely not seeking the same kind of women of other races. High potential black men are the ones who are most likely to seek the best looking black women first and foremost over high potential women of other races.
So assuming that this "Darren" (chuckle) exists
And that is definitely an assumption. I'm still trying to understand why she divorced this wonderful and perfect black man that she claims to have married. Either he was FAR from perfect or she was. Evia's track record of fabrications takes her credibility to the lowest levels.
I found everyone's commentary interesting.
In my opinion there is more attractive black women than white women. That is just my biased opinion. The issue is not really if white men are attracted to black women. The issue is will they take them serious other than just for sexual purposes.
In particular "high income" men of all races generally cheat with women that less educated and have less resources than they do.
I read an article that "high income and highly educated men" try to find women that are equal in status and have similar career ambitions like they do.
That is why a large segment of black women are married to professional black men on A WHOLE.
You mentioned the 60 percent statistic of black men that have a "high income" being married to non black women. Non black could mean Hispanic women, Asian women and white.
The problem with that 60 percent theory is the pool of black men making high income is relatively small. It is like competing for a NBA player and getting mad when he does not look at you.
I was watching Wendy Williams talk show and she asked Bill Belmany (The Black comedian) why his celebrity black male friends don't get involved with black women".
Bill Bellamy said " Yo man black women got to get aggressive. The white girls are out there man getting that attention. Quite often the black girls are in the back just standing their."
Bill also said his celebrity black male friends would like to meet a black woman to date even they can get in their "circle."
Anyway that is the rare exception. I believe black women should date the best mate. At the same time don't base it all on money. Money comes and goes.
If your spouse lost everything would you leave him. In life you never know what can happen.
Beauty is subjective. My main point is that in most cases beauty counts more for women than a college degree when men are evalauting women as mates. A college degree (or anything that raises his earning potential)counts more for a man than looks.
I don't know where these women got the idea that a college degree alone makes them "prized". They constantly rip on Tiger Woods for marrying a nanny (who also was/is a model). 4+ years and a kid (with another one on the way) later and they seem to be doing just fine.
They don't understand that most men will covet a model with a high school diploma over any wildebeest looking woman no matter how high her degree of education.
Dear Truth
I agree men can be superficial when evaluating a mate to date.
There is many highly educated black women and some choose to be alone. Some say they can't find a man to date on "their level." Again they choose to be selective to the point of dismissing some men.
They just make it seem like they are settling when it could be the man is a "good man" that will care for them.
By the time they figure that out. Their in their late 30s and achieved they wanted and feel alone. They was chasing the same men that other women were chasing.
Now they got the nerve to complain about it when you "can't" compete with other women in the "looks" department.
Looks get you far with men don't get me wrong. But I have seen average girls pull alot of men. That leads me to believe personality counts more than anything.
I have seen homely white women married and you mean to tell me black women tend be more attractive the rest even with "weight issues" and they can't find a serious man.
Hard to believe.
To each their own...isn't that what most bm are saying these days?
Black men in the military are very well known for dating/marrying other race women. i.e., where did tiger's father meet his mom? His dad was military. These types of pairing are all too common in the military.
Any man that wishes to be respected need to "STEP IT UP" and at least take care of the women in their familes.
The majority of bm need to get their acts together? Why the high crime rates in the bc?
alex
She will ridicule a black women if the women chooses to go to the hair dresser and get her hair washed, treated and styled. She seems to think that having hair "maintence" is trying to be" white". Like WTF??
This woman probably is one of those types that thinks everything is about the opposite sex. Some women just want to feel nice for and about themselves and getting their hair done is part of that.
To each their own...isn't that what most bm are saying these days?
That's what independent thinking people who live in a free society say.
Black men in the military are very well known for dating/marrying other race women. i.e., where did tiger's father meet his mom? His dad was military. These types of pairing are all too common in the military.
Don't understand your point here.
Any man that wishes to be respected need to "STEP IT UP" and at least take care of the women in their familes.
Agree 100% and this is independent of race or color.
The majority of bm need to get their acts together? Why the high crime rates in the bc?
Two major reasons: 1) The system sets many in the BC up for failure (poor schools, tougher punishments for the same crimes committed by others, drugs that somehow make their way from the jungles of South America or the Poppy Fields of Afghanistan to the streets of the ghettos even though people in the inner city don't own planes or boats that bring the drugs into the country)
2) Way too many people in the BC embrace the failure instead of fighting it (getting an education, not joining a gang, not having kids as a kid, avoiding drugs, etc).
The SS Crew will agree with number 2 while giving number 1 a pass since it implicates their would be knight in shining armor. That is the height of their intellectual dishonesty.
"They constantly rip on Tiger Woods for marrying a nanny (who also was/is a model). 4+ years and a kid (with another one on the way) later and they seem to be doing just fine."
Isn't Tiger Woods part white or asian or both? I thought he was a mix of several races? Why do they expect multiracial people to totally deny the other parts of them. For example if a "black man" with a white mother or very light skinned "black" mother or an asian mother prefers a white woman or a light skinned black woman or an asian woman they will talk about how he has self hate issues, when actually it is natural for a lot of men to be attracted to a woman who might in some way resemble his mother. And then some other people are attracted to looks that are "exotic" to them as well - not because they hate themselves,they just are. I don't know why they make it their business who is attracted to whom. I love to see all kinds of mixes and couples. It makes the world more interesting.
And I also think it is really unfair to bi-racial or multi-racial kids to force them to reject one part of their heritage. Especially if they have families on both side who love them very much. They make them feel like traitors for associating with the "lighter-skinned" part of them.
They put this list up on the White Women Suck blog of all the famous white women that are ugly (according to them) of course they mentioned Heidi Klum. Actually just about every famous white woman they could think of was on it - but they made sure to mention Heidi separately - I wonder why...
One of the biggest problems that the women commenting there have with white women is that they say they give them "bad looks" when they are with white men and that probably is true, women can be pretty petty no matter what their race, but they fail to mention the looks they give white women that they see with black men, especially if he is an obviously successful one.
Also funny is how they worship Obama for having a black wife when he had a white mom. Under their own rules, wouldn't that mean Obama hates his mom/half of himself?
Hypocrisy at its finest (or is that worst).
"Also funny is how they worship Obama for having a black wife when he had a white mom. Under their own rules, wouldn't that mean Obama hates his mom/half of himself?
Hypocrisy at its finest (or is that worst)."
Of course not because that would mean the white men they are with have some serious self hate issues as well. So they explain it by trying to prove that white women on top of being worthless girlfriends, wives, and people are also worthless mothers. (Therefore they deserve to have their son's hate them)
They don't attribute the fact that Obama is a great man to his mother, they stress the fact that he was raised by his White GrandFATHER. (and Asian Step Father)
Their latest thing is trying to imply what bad mothers white women are, which is just so deranged since everyone knows mothers have a big affect on their sons - so if the guys they are dating are such great guys, many of them probably had really nice moms. And probably the white men who are dating black women were raised by white moms and dads who were not as racist as some white people can be. To illustrate what horrible moms white women are, one of them gave an example of a couple of white women who abused or murdered her kids... as if the behavior of a few is indicitive of the behavior of millions. Of course something horrific will make its way into the papers. it isn't considered newsworthy to talk about the millions of white moms and wives who love their children and husbands and live quiet normal lives dedeicated to their families. Same goes for black men, the ones who are decent family men are just quietly living their lives with their families, and most likely not doing anything to get their names into the papers unless they happen to become famous.
Great post!!!! Please keep it up! i really hope hp and his minions get a chance to make it over here. maybe a look in the mirror will do the some good.
Post a Comment